Desperado Club Dirty Shirley

From Dungeon Crawler Carl by Matt Dinniman

 

 

You know how I feel about long walls of text, Carl.  

JUMP TO RECIPE 

 

Look, I know this is already a real thing. I fully realize I'm not exactly reinventing the wheel with this recipe. But I'm in the middle of a top-secret project—which I can't talk about yet because 🎶 licensed publishing 🎶—which means this is about all I can manage right now.

 

While I've been working on this very top-secret project, I've been listening to the fantastic audiobook editions of Dungeon Crawler Carl, narrated by the incredible Jeff Hays. It's been keeping me entertained while I cook and shake cocktails and stuff. And like seemingly everyone else in the world and their mother (whom Samantha would absolutely kill) ... I AM OBSESSED.

 

Luckily,  I already had everything I needed to make a Dirty Shirley, Princess Donut's signature drink: vodka, homemade grenadine, lemon-lime soda, an overabundance of toddler tiaras.

 

For anyone who hasn't read Dungeon Crawler Carl: Princess Donut (GC, BWR, NW Princess Donut the Queen Anne Chonk) starts the series as a prize-winning Persian cat. She — along with Carl, her former owner's boyfriend and, well, technically the "main" character, I suppose— is suddenly thrust into a deadly dungeon crawl, granted a more advanced form of sentience, and forced to figure out who she is beyond being someone's pet and a show cat. 

 

As the series unfolds, Donut grows into a hero in her own right, but her complicated memories of her past life and her former owner, Beatrice, never really leave her. In Carl's Doomsday Scenario, she reminisces about Beatrice's love of Dirty Shirleys, a drink which traditionally consists of vodka, grenadine, an lemon-lime soda. It's the "adult" version of the Shirley Temple.  

 

In The Dungeon Anarchist's Cookbook, Donut finally has the opportunity to order one for herself at the Desperado Club, a members-only nightclub where crawlers go to drink, gamble, socialize, and occasionally get into spectacular trouble. It's the first alcoholic drink she's ever had, and she gets spectacularly drunk. Drunk cats... What could be better?

 

So here's a Dirty Shirley with a little flair, plenty of bedazzle, and so, so many cherries.

 

Ingredients (per drink):

 

For the drink: 

• 2 ounces vodka (try it with vanilla vodka!)
• 3/4 ounce grenadine
• 1/2 ounce lime juice 
• 4 to 6 ounces lemon-lime soda  
• Generous pinch of edible purple luster dust (optional) 
• 8 to 10 maraschino cherries

 

For garnish:

• Corn syrup (For the rim)
• Purple sanding sugar (For some sparkle!)
• Lime wedges or wheels 

 

Recommended Vessel: Ice Cream Dish or Fish Bowl

Recommended Ice: Standard or Pebble 

 

 

Directions:

1.  To rim the serving glass, pour a thin layer of corn syrup onto one small plate and sanding sugar onto another. Dip the rim of the glass lightly into the corn syrup, then immediately into the sanding sugar, twisting gently to coat evenly. Tap off any excess and let the rim set for 5 minutes
2. Add the vodka, grenadine, and fresh lime juice and give these a quick stir. 
3. Fill the serving glass with ice.  
4. Top with lemon-lime soda and stir gently to combine. 
5. Garnish with plenty of maraschino cherries and a lime wheel and sprinkle with edible purple luster dust, if desired.